Fanny's Commonplace Book

Journal Entry:

I stumbled upon this book a few weeks ago and I haven’t put it down since. It has great advice for how a woman like me should act. I still keep coming back to this specific line. Well… I am having trouble figuring out how to step into this new chapter of being a bride. I cannot believe I am getting married after all these years to Edward Marsh. Just a few years ago he was struggling to pay rent. I was in love with him before, but now it is so much more than that. I was so jealous of my sister's youth that I…

Journal Entry:

I need to decide on a hairstyle for the wedding. I am starting to get awfully worried about all of the planning. It by no means will be a large wedding, but I hope to show off some sort of class. I want people to know I am worthy after all this time. I feel like my glory days are past and yet love still lingers. I always felt like I was behind my sisters. I would try to do anything to somehow fit in, but I was always just worn-out thirty-year-old Fanny. I want that to change. I want to prove myself. It may seem…

Journal Entry: 

After the death of my father, I really struggled as the eldest sister. I wanted to be there for my sisters, but when I did, I felt like I was grieving on my own, all alone. My father's passing put so much pressure on me, on us. Pressure to be a good sister, a caretaker, and a leader when it seemed hopeless. I didn't understand the possibility of opening up, and because of this, I remained weak. It is not good for a woman to be sad, I would tell myself. A proper woman does not show her emotion but remains…